reach strategically

I don't really know where to start, to be honest. Because it's been amazing, yet, frustrating. It the week when I can see clearly the cross. The cross, where Jesus was crucified. I see it in the people, I see it through my reflection. Because everyday, I nailed that nail into His hands, and I put the crown of thorns in His head again, and again. I see it through people's life, I see it in people's eyes, I see it in my own life. I know that it was my sins that He took. I was just one of them. Sinners. The wretch one. I am no difference than the killer, the people in the street and the homeless. I am just one of them. I am nothing more than any of them, I try to find Jesus, but when I finally found Him, I failed Him. I am a failure. I can never ever be perfect. That's why He came. And rescue me. He know that I can't be with Him without grace. This week, I had an opportunity to get to the people, the worse people and the wretch. The homeless, the drugs addict, the ...

It is the storm that made me who I am right now. It was thundering, the storm was a reality for me. I couldn't see anything else besides the tree that shaking, the roaring thunder and the lightning. It was dark, it was really dark. The water start coming to my face and it was cold. I was shivering. My hair was soaking wet. And the water was just pouring out from the sky. And I cried out loud, "Father! Where are you?" He didn't answer me. I couldn't see Him anywhere. It was again, the reality for me. I was scared, I see nothing but the storm. The trees shaking really hard and the thunder is roaring again. I cried. I scream on top of my lounge. It still raining. And as a thunder rolls, I barely hear, He whisper through the rain, "I'm with you..." And after that, all I know is I was on my Father's chest. I am His and He is mine. If there were no storms, there's no me right now. I've been learning a lot, I've been falling a lot but again,...

What? What is coming?? What?? The season is coming, dude! The spring is coming up!! You all maybe laugh... or think that I am crazy but let me tell you. You have no idea how happy I am that today was actually 60 degrees. It's been like ages since I feel the warm weather... Minnesota is pretty darn cold, as you all know and I've been experiencing the coldest winder in the past 6 years, so... I totally have a right to be partying all night for warmness. I celebrated it! Woke up this morning and I went running with some friend... aaahhh... so amazing! You just have no clue how warm it is and how nice it is... after that, I sat down in patio and start reading a book. The sun shining down on me... the birds are coming back... oh, it was great. It was so great. And then me and couple friends went to the river near by... and it just unbelievable. We sat down in the grass, reading a book, and I did some sketch. PRAISE JESUS!! When I was in Indonesia, I never be so thankful for warm, ev...

This is one of those day... you know, when you feel so crappy... and just want to quit from life. I feel like crap, everything is crap. People, work, classes, cell group... this is just wasting my time. Aaah! I need to leave.. I need to go... I don't know where. I want to be home. I am so emotional, I am so desperate, I am going crazy. I started felling sick, so I decided to take 2 hours off from my work in the kitchen, I felt so ridiculously horrible. My stomach and head hurts, issues with friends and society... Tired of life. I really don't like being in the USA, to be really honest with you. I rather go back to Indonesia and leave in my stinky old room. I just want to go home. But, I don't have home anymore. I woke up this morning and I woke my roommate up, and the first thing that came out from her mouth is the whine sound. I am so sick of it. I left and I promise my self that I will never ever whine, because I realize how annoying it is. Two of my best friend here, is ...